It’s every girl’s dream to one day get married to that man that would make her happy and make her life better. Believe it or not, marriage is a big issue when it comes to a girl’s life, no matter how successful she is or how indifferent she seems to marriage, she wants it bad. The society and even families have actually not made it any better. So ladies of a certain age begin to worry and become anxious about wearing a ring and walking the aisle in a white dress .In the process due to poor judgment and not hearing from God, some ladies have jumped into marriages that have brought about their downfall. For the single ladies, here is a list of men that you should never say I DO to.
Please write 2 Corinthians 6:14 on a Post-it note and tack it on your computer at work. It says, “Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness?” (NASB). This is not an outdated religious rule. It is the Word of God for you today. Don’t allow a man’s charm, looks or financial success (or his willingness to go to church with you) push you to compromise what you know is right. “Missionary dating” is never a wise strategy. If the guy is not a born-again Christian, scratch him off your list. He’s not right for you. I’ve yet to meet a Christian woman who didn’t regret marrying an unbeliever.
This brother thinks he is God’s gift to women. He is calculating, well spoken, tactical and a smooth operator. He goes about proposing to ladies and convincing them saying stuff like “it is a special mystical attraction, something beautiful , beyond you and I”, and for the very spiritual ladies he tells them “it is the will of God”, only to go back on his word when he sees another lady he believes is better than the last one. He has a sugar coated tongue and can talk himself out of any situation. “It is you not me,” ” I just need sometime alone to get myself together”, ” I don’t think, I am good enough for you”. Most times he even extorts money from the ladies, promising to give it back because his check has been delayed, his clients has not paid, his dog died or in the name of God’s will (mschewwww). From such, run.
To the freakish and wayward lady he may appear fun to be with, he is always talking about sexually related topics and cracking dirty jokes, he indulges in pornographic materials, he believes women are meant to cook and be slept with only. He believes sex is a recreation, and so pays no mind to how many partners he has had, would ask for sex before marriage and has no plans to buy a ring but prefers a live in lover and would simply claim it is a test of compatibility. Most of his friends are just like him, perverts! They would gather after work and talk about their many victorious conquests and if he eventually decides to marry, getting married to this brother would lead you down the path of heartbreak, misery, sin and disease. I wish I could say that if you meet a nice guy at church, you can assume he’s living in sexual purity. But that’s not the case today. We have Casanovas serving in church and raising ‘Holy’ hands on Sundays. If you marry a guy who was sleeping around before your wedding, you can be sure he will be sleeping around after your wedding.
This mummy’s boy is in most cases a carbon copy of his mother and is tied to her Apron. All decisions have to be made by his mother (mummy said this, mummy said that), he would constantly compare you to his mother. You would soon discover that you are married to his mother. Why you should also never get married to a man who has no regard for his mother, don’t put yourself in the bondage of having a mother in law influenced marriage.
This group also includes the weakling, who cannot put his foot down but would allow all members of his family treat his wife like a foot mat, seeing nothing wrong in the disrespect of his wife by his friends, and family alike. This kind of marriage is very heartbreaking as the wife might eventually lose all self-esteem and worth or be in a constant battle with her own extended family.
This brother is always chasing money at the expense of having good relationship with even his family members, in some cases he may be a nice man, but his priority is first anything that brings money even at the expense of having a good relationship with anyone even God, you would constantly feel alone in that marriage and you would have the sole responsibility of raising your kids. He would give you money but money we know is not everything. Run from the workaholic.
THE LONE RANGER:
This Man (lone Ranger) has issues with all his family members, his place of work and he does things solely on his own. He is his own mentor and he looks up to nobody, he rates himself by himself for himself. This type of man is one of the most dangerous men to marry because your life, career, vision, everything would be at his mercies. This kind of man also tends to be abusive because they are answerable to no one but themselves. Men with abusive tendencies can’t control their anger when it boils over. If the guy you are dating has a tendency to fly off the handle, either at you or others, please don’t be tempted to rationalize his behavior. He has a problem, and if you marry him you will have to navigate his minefield every day to avoid triggering another outburst. Angry men hurt women—verbally and sometimes physically. Find a man who is gentle.
This brother is also close to the lone ranger, he seems to be nice and considerate sometimes but afterwards you discover that the only opinion that counts is his. His words are louder than his actions. He has his whole life planned out and you are supposed to just fit in or there would be trouble, he sees your thoughts, ideas and opinions as inferior to his. He is a vision killer. Marrying you would just be something on his bucket list, then you would also need to fulfill another, which is all what he believes and wants you to be to him. He is simply a dictator not a husband. This kind of man would also occasionally hit his wife or fiancée (let abuse be a tie breaker in whatever relationship you are in). Some Christian guys today believe marriage is about male superiority. They may quote Scripture and sound super-spiritual, but behind the façade of husbandly authority is deep insecurity and pride that can morph into spiritual abuse. First Peter 3:7 commands husbands to treat their wives as equals. If the man you are dating talks down to you, makes demeaning comments about women or seems to squelch your spiritual gifts, back away now. He is on a power trip. Women who marry religious control freaks often end up in a nightmare of depression.
Sometimes this brother comes around with a drinking addiction, or drug habit. From such flee. Churchgoing men who have addictions to alcohol or drugs have learned to hide their problems—but you don’t want to wait until your honeymoon to find out that he’s a boozer. Never marry a man who refuses to get help for his addiction. Insist that he get professional help and walk away. And don’t get into a codependent relationship in which he claims he needs you to stay sober. You can’t fix him.
THE LAZY BONE:
This brother is slow, always inactive, prefers to be fed in bed, has no focus, or clearly cut goals, has a non -chalant attitude to everything around, finds it difficult to keep his house, his clothes or even his car clean, tends to be disorganized and clumsy, this lazy bone needs just about 3 helps NOT a wife.
BROTHER FOR SHOW:
This brother lives in the “notice me” world, he can do anything for people as long as it is in public and people would like him at the expense of his own family, or even himself. This is the kind of man that can take his female colleague or boss to the grocery store or Main markets to buy things while his own wife or family member would take a cab. He goes to clean other peoples’ yard while his is dirty because he wants to be seen and respected by the public. You would be better off being the public to this brother than being his family member.
If you discover that the man you are dating has lied to you about his past or that he’s always covering his tracks to hide his secrets from you, run for the nearest exit. Marriage must be built on a foundation of trust. If he can’t be truthful, break up now before he bamboozles you with an even bigger deception.
I have a female friend who realized after she married her boyfriend that he had no plans to find steady work. He had devised a great strategy: He stayed home all day and played video games while his professional wife worked and paid all the bills. The apostle Paul told the Thessalonians, “If anyone is not willing to work, then he is not to eat, either” (2 Thess. 3:10). The same rule applies here: If a man is not willing to work, he doesn’t deserve to marry you.
I sincerely hope you can find a guy who is handsome. But be careful: If your boyfriend spends six hours a day at the gym and regularly posts closeups of his biceps on Facebook, you have a problem. Do not fall for a self-absorbed guy. He might be cute, but a man who is infatuated with his appearance and his own needs will never be able to love you sacrificially, like Christ loves the church (Eph. 5:25). The man who is always looking at himself in the mirror will never notice you.
Call me old-fashioned, but I’m suspicious of a guy who still lives with his parents at age 35. If his mother is still doing his cooking, cleaning and ironing at that age, you can be sure he’s stuck in an emotional time warp. You are asking for trouble if you think you can be a wife to a guy who hasn’t grown up. Back away and, as a friend, encourage him to find a mentor who can help him mature.
If you are a woman of God, don’t sell your spiritual birthright by marrying a guy who doesn’t deserve you. Your smartest decision in life is to wait for a man who is sold out to Jesus. You are much better off single than with the wrong guy!
Love is patient and kind but not blind. Pray for the right man for you and also open your eyes. Did I forget to mention that only the right lady finds the right man?